The Marks of a Godly Father

Most of you will remember last fall and the times that we spent in prayer for Tucker Whitaker and all that he was going through in those weeks and months at Duke University Hospital. There were others who went through that with him and one is here today to share with us about that from a father's perspective as to what it was like to watch your son go through such a deep, deep, physical trial. I remember sometime after Tucker was on the mend and getting better that Jeff said to me his father. He said, this story needs to be told and the church needs to hear the story. I don't think he really thought I would take him up on that. But I did. A couple months ago, I said, Jeff, you know, if you still have that in your heart to share, I think father's day would be a great time to do that. So Jeff Whitaker is going to come down and share from a father's perspective what happened last year and is continuing with Tucker. Good morning. I do want to express our deep appreciation to this church that you have so faithfully and supported us with calls and cards, visits and gifts, especially holding a special prayer service for Tucker. I want to tell you how your prayers have been answered. You deserve a report of all that has happened and we want to give God the full credit he deserves for all that he has done from Ashley and Tucker and our combined families. We thank you. I also have to say in order to keep all this on track and try to get through this, I need to read this. The best I can piece the sequence of events is start September 21, 2013. Tucker and Ashley participated in a walk-out on Charlotte where they lived since getting married just a few months before. Tucker was tired at the end and the next day we were running a fever. He went to the doctor on Monday and got some antibiotics and by Thursday told me he was much better. Saturday, September 28, Garrett and I are bow-hunting, my favorite time of year. Beautiful, fall morning and peaceful in the woods. I had no idea I would spend the next three months in an ICU unit in a hospital. We never know what a day will hold. At 10 a.m. that morning, my cell phone rang. Garrett, my youngest son, says he was coming to pick me up on the full wheel. And it called Tucker's in Charlotte. I see you. They think he has spinal meningitis. Garrett and I stop and pray. So we don't understand what got to let things happen. We believe he is in control and pray for his mercy. By the time I get home and has this pact, quit clean up and we head to Charlotte. When we arrived, we found Ashley with Tucker and he was unconscious. We found she had been unable to wake him that morning. And since arriving at the hospital, it had a seizure. They weren't sure what was wrong. They had about ruled out the meningitis, but they didn't know. 4 a.m. the next morning, Ashley and I stayed in the room with him all night. The nurse came in and tried to wake him. He woke. He knew his name, his birthday, but was confused about the year. Ashley gave me a big smile that he was awake and I gave her a thumbs up. He immediately went into a bad seizure. They rushed us out into a small room and we tried to get ourselves back together. The doctor came in and said he was calm but out again. They said they had him an anti-seizure meds and would watch him closely. I asked him if this was your son, where would you take him? He said he had worked at Duke and that is where he suggested. One of Ashley's friends, a lead nurse, came down to comfort her. We asked the same question and received the same answer. Duke. Brian and Sandy and an I discussed the situation with Ashley. We agreed on Duke. The doctor made the call. The said it could take as long as a week to 10 days to get in. One of Tucker's best friends who Ashley had informed him what was going on called and said in 30 minutes, the doctor would be receiving a call. In 30 minutes, the call came. We had a bad at Duke. At midnight, we entered Duke. I saw you six floors. They hooked him up on an EEG machine to monitor brainwaves and all the other stuff they normally do. He was showing what they call angry brainwaves and seizure activity. They started adding more anti-seizure drugs and nothing to do with it. The doctor told us what we were possibly facing. He said this also several cases similar this year, mostly young healthy people. He said only 20% of the time, do they ever find out what was causing it? 40% of the time, they don't live through it. He said, we run a roller coaster. The costum dust don't get too high on the hard and try not to get too low on the lows. They were very kind, but very direct. By the end of the week, Tucker was on six anti-seizure meds and several other kinds of drugs. The problem was, he was still showing angry brainwaves and seizure activity. They said they needed to get him into the main neurological unit on the eight floor and wanted to put him into a pinnabarbitol in Duge coma. They started him on the pinnabarbit and kept increasing the dosage to try to suppress the seizures. After about a week of that, they wanted to add a cooling catheter to a blood vessel in a chest to cool his body, to lower his metabolism and further suppress the seizure activity. They lowered him down to 92 degrees. It soon became evident why 40% don't survive. When you slow the metabolism down, a lot slows. Soon his breathing, digestion and his ability to get rid of all the fluids that go into his body are problems. Now, we had about 20 leads glued to his head, about half a dozen wires to his chest. A blood pressure cuff on his arm, a feeding tube, an stomach, a ventilator machine hooked to the traitotube and his throat, a cooling line to his chest. To our V stations, one on each side would have a dozen pumps and extra bags of tubes and his neck as arms in his hand. He had fought off two strains of pneumonia, but now started taking on fluidity. His digestion had slowed and his mouth were coming back. His breathing was fast becoming critical. We were all becoming very tired. Every morning and every evening, a team of doctors, nurses, dieticians, pharmacy, respiratory and others come to check on Tucker. They answer our questions, tell the latest lab results and their plans. Actually being an ICU nurse herself is amazing. She converses in medical terminology back and forth with the teams and interprets to me when they finish. She is very tired and stressed. The stays on top of every move they make. She interprets well, but what we are seeing now needs no interpretation. The sixty pounds of fluid that Tucker now has extra in his swollen body, along with back baths as blood pressure, heart and breathing at extremely critical levels. They've run every test they can think of. They've tried many drugs with no solution. Doctors are running tests on blood and fluid samples all over the country and overseas in England and even Spain. Because the government shutdown, very blizzard gets the information involved to get the government CDC lab in Atlanta to run tests. No one else can run. The doctors assure us there is a great number of people working very hard to help Tucker. With actually consent, they get permission from the FDA to use a study drug from California. The understanding was that it would have been used a few times and this would be the first time ever that someone would get it without a brain injury. As they start to study drug, it is supposed to be increased over five day period and the pinnabar abuse with the coma is supposed to be decreased over the same five days. But on the second day, they walk in and cut the pinnabar completely off. They say he's gotten so bad he can't take it anymore. The study drug continues and about the third day shows some hope of helping. But the next day, we are back where we started. Now all has failed. All meds, diets, blood transfusions, antibodies, steroids, every test back negative. DNA teams, infectious disease teams, all they can come up with has failed. But he is getting worse. The doctor, though the whole neurological unit stood in front of us the next morning. He tells the nurses, don't move him. Don't rotate the pillows from side to side. Don't try to lay him flat. It's hands off. The ventilator is set to maximum and has been per day. Now I'm not reading the screens and monitors as much as I'm reading the faces of the doctors and nurses in front of us. They're a usual pattern of coming in every morning and back every evening changes. They're in and out, several times all day. I see some of them hanging around in the hall. They don't say much. They don't have to. Right, eat me. Tuck is even worse. All the way and I just gone home the day before. I go down to the hall to an out of the way place and call home. I can't even get the words up. I'm trying to say and knows and says they're coming as quickly as they can. I have no hope. But they will make the three and a half hours in time. He's gotten that bad. As I come around the corner heading back to the room, I'm at Dorothy. I nurse from Ghana. She has been his nurse several times over the past month and a half. And like many of the other nurses, I've been keeping watch. They're not assigned to him today. They all have gotten attached to these young Newtiewids and had some like Dorothy had become great friends to me. She catches my arm. You can't give up. You have to keep asking God. You have to keep asking God sent yet another person to the right place at the right time. I need to hear that so badly. It makes me remember there are many other asking as well. Many nurses and doctors who are believers this church, especially Tucker and Ashley's church, family and their friends. Even children like the one Tucker and Ashley's at their church. The reports of people praying and even places like Trinidad were talking others have gone with young Simmons. I remember days when I had patients and endurance. I know it weren't mine. I know it's because people are praying and this is one of those days. The family made it and tough made it through the night. They've done all they can and there's no reason for any of this to work now. Perhaps God has waited for them to do all they can. I don't know, but the fluid starts coming off. In just a few days we are amazed how much better he looks. More comes off and by the weekend he is stable again. He is breathing much better and so are we. It's not said but you can tell. No one thought he would make it. After a few more days they start to warm him back up. They can't keep him cold forever. As he warms some seizure activity returns. The roller coaster goes on. Then one morning they come to us and tell of a Dr. Nejar from New York. He is a specialist making grand rounds to hospitals all over the world. He has booked a year in advance. And today he happens to be a Duke. They have discussed Tucker's case with him and now they think it fits the category of a possible autoimmune disorder. They think the white cells are attacking the red cells in his brain and causing the seizures. They tell us the brain bobc could tell for sure but the results would take five to seven days and the chemo drugs they would use would take another five to seven days to take effect. His breathing has gotten bad again and his pressures are up and down. They say we don't have that kind of time. They say we are in life saving mode today. What choice do we have? Ashley nods me yes and I tell them if you think this is it, give him the drugs right now. They set it up to give the rot toxin as soon as possible and then weekly and the cytoxin is the next day and then monthly. They give the weekly drug the next morning and plan to get the other the next day. The next day he has a fever and the liver enzymes are climbing. They wait another day, the fever persists and his enzymes are even a little hard. They give it to him anyway. They don't want to damage the liver but they're trying to save his life. It's a tough balance act and it's very tough on Ashley. Both chemo drugs in and it'd be more days he starts to show improvement. They try backing off some of the other drugs again. The next morning Wednesday I come in my usual 6.45 AM and check with the outgoing nurse and wait to see who his nurse the day will be. He is stable and did well through the night. I text Ashley, I give her my report until I see her in a bit. I go downstairs to eat breakfast. I come back at 8 o'clock. I see the EEG screen, seizures. White clockwork every 10 minutes. I continue to watch and they persist. I sense someone beside me enough to see one of his doctors. She's been watching from her monitor. She tells me his liver enzymes tell them that he's had about enough drugs and they may have to pull them. She tells me direct. If we have to pull them and this much seizure activity persist, Tucker will definitely have brain damage. Ashley comes in and we tell her what's up. We ask what can be done if anything. In my thing, ECT, electro-combulsive treatments, interpreting down to my level, they want a shock as brain. They hope to synchronize as brain to try to get the wavelength stable. You can't just order it done. Ashley will have to go to court to petition a judge along with a letter from Duke to allow this to be done. Again, what choice do we have? If we discuss it, we'll say he said it up. This is Wednesday. The plan is court on Thursday, shock treatment on Friday afternoon. At 12 o'clock this day, as quickly as the seizures had started, they stopped. They have gone on every 10 minutes for four hours. Now they stop. And now they tell us on Thursday, they will start backing off some of the seizure drugs. The idea now is they want him to be having a seizure when they shock him. They want to synchronize the entire brain to get stable again. No guarantee you will work at all, but that's where we're at. Thursday comes and they start backing off the drugs. Later we're told the court date can't happen until next week. Friday comes and they back off a little more. Friday afternoon comes, as with the nurse and hour in the room watching touch them. This is supposed to be about the time we're going to be shocking him. He shocks us. He opens his eyes for about 10 seconds. For the first time since December 29th, we see his eyes open. Now it's November 22nd, eight weeks. The nurse leaves and returns with other nurses and doctors. Though his eyes are closed again, they speak loudly. If you can hear us, move your thumbs. They slowly move. If you can hear us, stick out your tongue about a minute goes by and he slowly sticks out his tongue. The excitement fills the room and soon the entire floor. We don't know how that. He's still in there and able to respond. The next day he opens his eyes again a little longer and even longer that afternoon. He responds more to voice commands and quicker than before. As she tells him, she loves him. He can't speak yet but he mouths the words, I love you. We are back in business. In quite a business, it becomes the eight weeks of being out and under so many drugs have reduced the 165 pound muscle tone young man to a very weak 123 pounds. He can't lift his head off the pillow. He will have to learn to swallow, talk, set up, stand and walk all over again. We work with him every day. It's a struggle. After about a week more, he's able to talk better. He knows actually for sure. He tells the nurse that he points to me, I like him. He helps me. We let it go. The doctor said, give him time. His brain has been through great deal trauma. They don't know how much drugs and seizures have affected his memory. He's going to sleep so long it will take a long time to wake up. They encourage us to be patient and don't upset him. Stress can trigger seizures. There are no rules. We have to feel our way through this. We're being very careful. Even with this, he has an occasional small seizure. One evening, he wants to call his dad. I know he's not strong enough for confrontation. His brain often is busy and until he undercover myself as I slip down the hall. He does and gives the phone to tuck. He tells me he's sick and in the hospital. I tell him I know and I will come soon. He is satisfied for now. I despise the deception. But I hope more time will help. I slip back in and noticed. After a couple of weeks go by, he's getting stronger and becoming much more alert. His speech has greatly improved. Every day has made a difference. He has moved finally out of ICU to a step down unit. As we help the therapist use a lift to put him over into a chair, he says he wants to call his dad. He said, if his dad knew he was sick, he would come see him. I've had enough. I want to tell him. It may be stressful, but he's stressed now. His dad should come see him. I talked to Ashley and one of the doctors who just came by. They agree. Just tell me. See how it goes. I knew it down in front of him and tell him, I'm your dad. No, you're not my dad. You look like my dad, but you're not my dad. The more I try to explain, the more upset he becomes. The therapist asked me if I have any tattoos, he might remember. I tell her no. I said, all I have is the end of a finger gun since I was trying to have a bull on it in the shoot on the farm. I tell her it happened 20 years ago, but he was there. The old saying, take the bull by the horns. Don't do it. It hurts. It cost me the end of this finger. I asked him if he remembered his dad's finger in the bull on the farm. Said he did. I showed him my hand and told him how it happened. He held my hand and felt my finger. He was buriped, said. He said his aunt, you were supposed to come cut his hair today, and she would tell him that I wasn't his dad. How he's going to recognize her, I have no idea. He was so upset, I told her, actually, I was going to leave. I went out to a small corner of the lobby, a small secluded spot I had gone off on over the past, and I told him, I told him, you know how this feels. You want us to know who you are and even call you Abba Daddy. And that's what I'm asking. I want Tucker to know. As I am, I want him to call me his dad. Jucos said they had arrived. I went downstairs to meet them. I explained to you and Mary what was going on. I told them as we went back, I had no idea what we were walking into. As we enter the room, I see a tear face and open arms. I know you're my dad. My brother and sisters, I don't care what the calendar says, it's Father Day at Duke. As we settle down, it all seemed to come together. He asked me about me and you can get it. He even seemed to recognize you and Mary. As you and Mary, and Ashley had lunch, he wants me to stay. He said, he just wants to talk with the dad. The things that God has done. Several weeks later, he told me that it was my finger that convinced him that I was his dad. There is nothing that God can't use. It may be twenty years down the road and maybe a tragedy at the time and very well may be. God can use it. As he says in his word, he works in all things of the good, those who love him. Looking back, I see that a small taste of what it's like to want someone to love you, that you love to know who you are. For his son, to recognize who you are and call you his dad. I see it a little better how God must feel as he wants us to recognize who he is and for us to call him our Father. He loves us so much he gave us his son, Jesus. I also was given a small taste of the joy he must feel when we do. The things that God has done indeed. One of the things I've learned over the past years through trials and hardships as we all face, I try to ask God to help me learn the lessons I need to learn and to use these to help others. It is my prayer that this encourages each one of you to keep praying and all things, to keep asking God even when it seems hopeless. I know your prayers have meant much to us and obviously they have much more to God. We can't choose our dads but we can choose our Heavenly Father. How much he wants that. Before we leave Duke to his doctors and several of his close nurses come to me and say this is absolutely a miracle. We hope to leave Duke with a good witness. We can leave him with none better than the one that God himself leads. Before I turn this over to John, let me tell you they never had to use the shot treatment. Then we used the more harsh cytoxin drug once because they responded so quickly they stopped it. They gave the Rotexin drug for four weeks and then used it monthly for four months. He spent one month inpatient rehab and short and about four months in outpatient at short. He's back up to 160 pounds and physically doing great because of the location of so many of the seizures his memory of the past five to six years has been affected. Lord parts of it, he does not recall. He's getting small parts of it back and the doctors think he has a good chance to get it back in time. The last MRI showed no damage, no damage and no small miracle in itself. It may be some time before he can work. Please continue to pray for a full recovery. Please pray for patients for both Ashley and Tucker as they continue to work through all this. They both seem to have great attitudes. Large crowds and doing too much without enough rest bring on stress. He's had a couple of small seizures of the past four months. They're being very careful and that we want to tuck an ash here with us today thought it better to wait. Tucker says he wants to someday come and thank you himself until you, like God, is done for him. Until then, we thank you for them and praise God. Happy Father's Day. Shortly after I came to Johnston Chapel, I remember Jeff asking me, John, please don't call on me to pray. I have difficulty doing that in front of a crowd. I pray at home, everything's good with the Lord. I just can't do that publicly. Come a long way, hasn't he? And his own right, God has done a great work in Jeff's heart and life. I knew this would be difficult for Jeff. He texted me earlier this week and said, you still want me up there? Yes. Thank you, Jeff, for being willing to share that. I sincerely hope that story makes it so we end up in print someday. A broader audience needs to hear that story. We have heard a gripping story, an amazing story of God's intervention in a young man's life and of his working through doctors and nurses and doing miraculous things. Part of the story that I have always been most touched about is how Tucker recognized his dad. He recognized him by a physical mark that led him back to an experience he had had with his dad. And that brought recognition. Would to God that would be true for all of us fathers here today? That we would be recognized by certain marks by our children. Not necessarily physical marks, but I'm thinking this morning more in terms of moral and spiritual knowledge and moral and spiritual marks, things that mark our lives morally and spiritually. And thus calls a recognition on the part of our children and grandchildren that we are indeed men of God. We need generations of boys and girls, young men and young women who see the characteristics of a father that will mark them out as Godly men. And so for a few moments this morning I want to call your attention to one of those men who did leave such a mark. His name is Abraham. His story is told in the book of Genesis. The life of Abraham demonstrates four marks our children need to see in us. Quickly let me remind you of his life and the marks that he left behind of a godly man. First of all Abraham was a man of faith. Genesis 15 describes his faith. God had made him a promise back in chapter 12 that he would have a seed and that he would be the father of many nations. And yet he has no son yet at this point. And so he cries out to the Lord in verse three, you have given me no children. So a servant in my household will be my heir. Then the word of the Lord came to him. This man will not be your heir but a son who is your own flesh and blood will be your heir. He took him outside and said, look up at the sky and count the stars. If indeed you can count them, then he said, so shall your offspring be. Abraham believed the Lord and he credited it to him as righteousness. Abraham believed God and God marked on his account in heaven. He has a righteous standing before me. It was his faith that caused God to save him. Paul uses him as an example in the book of Romans of that kind of faith that saves. Where Paul says in Romans chapter four, if in fact Abraham was justified by works he had something to boast about but not before God. What does scripture say? And he quotes the verse we just read. Abraham believed God and it was credited to him as righteousness. Now to the one who works, wages are not credited as a gift but as an obligation. However to the one who does not work but trusts God who justifies the ungodly, their faith is credited as righteousness. Abraham's first mark and most important mark is that he is a man of faith. He trusted God. He trusted the promise of God and God credited that to him for righteousness. And the Bible teaches that if we trust the promise of God, the word of God that he has sent us salvation in the person of his son and in the work of his son by dying on the cross. If we trust God's word on that issue, then we will be saved as well. The Bible makes that clear in a verse that we've talked about just recently, John chapter five and verse 24. Very truly, I tell you Jesus said, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life. It is faith in the promise of God which means I will send my son to be your savior. That's the promise of God to us. It is faith in his promise and in the work of Christ on the cross for us that saves us, that justifies us, that gives us a pure righteous standing in the sight of God. And what we need today is men who recognize that the greatest mark you can leave your children is the mark of a man who knows Christ. The mark of a man of faith, one who has trusted Christ and can thus lead his family spiritually. Abraham was a man of faith but he was also marked secondly by being a man of conviction. In chapter 13, the story is told of Abraham and Lot, his nephew who had accompanied him to the land of Canaan. But they have outgrown the land, their flocks have outgrown the land they are in now. And so Abraham says, you know, our workers are not having enough room to do what they need to do to tend the flocks. You take your choice of land and I'll take the rest. And so the Bible says in chapter 13, verse 10, Lot looked around and saw that the whole plane of the Jordan towards Zorah was well watered like the Garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt. This was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah. So Lot chose for himself the whole plane of the Jordan and set out toward the east, the two men parted company. Abraham lived in the land of Canaan, while Lot lived among the cities of the plain and pitched his tents near Sodom. Here's the issue, Lot looks out to see what will benefit me the most, what will advance my career the most, what will make me the most successful, what will bring me the greatest amount of wealth. That's what I choose. And that's the basis of my choice. That's Lot. Lot chooses a well watered plane that looks down toward the wicked city of Sodom because he believes that's what will bring him the greatest gain and success and wealth and position. So his gaze, his eyes are only on this world, only on the things that will benefit him materially, physically, making him a success in other people's eyes. Not so Abraham. There's a commentary on this story in the book of Hebrews chapter 11 that tells us where Abraham's gaze was. By faith, speaking of Abraham, he made his home in the promised land like a stranger in a foreign country. He lived in tents as did Isaac and Jacob who were heirs with him of the same promise. For he was looking forward to the city whose foundations, whose architect and builder is God. He's looking for a different kind of city than Lot's looking for. And verse 16 tells us what that city is. He was looking for a city. Is there another verse there for 16? Okay, should be there. It talks about the fact that they were looking for heavenly home, a heavenly home, not an earthly home. They were looking for a heavenly home. And therefore God was not ashamed to call them his children and be their father because they were looking for a heavenly home. You see what Abraham was looking for was not an earthly home. He was not looking for a city like Sodom. He was not looking for what would benefit him and make him most successful. He was looking toward heaven. And we need men with that kind of conviction today. We need men with the conviction who will say, I'm not going to live for what will prosper me and benefit me in this life. That's not going to be where my gaze is. That's not going to be where my ambitions are. That's not going to be what I live for. I will live for heaven. My home is in heaven. This is not my home. And so I will live with everything I do contributing toward a heavenly outlook and toward reward which will come to me someday in heaven. That was Abraham's conviction and because of that conviction, God was not ashamed to be called his father. We need men of conviction like that today. But we also need men of leadership. And Abraham's third mark was a mark of leadership. He was a man of leadership. In chapter 18, just before God destroys Sodom and Gomorrah, he confides in Abraham what he's going to do. And the reason he says he's confiding in him is because he knows he will provide the proper leadership to his family. Let's read it. Chapter 18 verse 17, then the Lord said, shall I hide from Abraham what I am about to do? Abraham will surely become a great and powerful nation and all nations on earth will be blessed through him for I have chosen him so that notice this so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just so that the Lord will bring about for Abraham what he is promising. God says I've chosen Abraham and I will bless him and I will give him my promises because I know he will lead his family in the right way. And notice what God says about the manner of his leadership. He will direct his children and his household that indicates legitimate authority that God has placed in the heart and mind of a man over his family to lead his family. He will direct his children and his household that's godly leadership, kind, courteous, not domineering, but leadership nonetheless, men take that leadership, but notice it is leadership where he will direct his children and his household after him. In other words, it's leadership by example as well. He will set the way, he will cart the course, he will walk ahead of his family and I know that he will lead them and direct them after him in a way that is godly and right. And so it's example leadership that is meant here and men we need to set the example for our children by leading them to church, by leading them to live godly lives, by leading them to read their Bibles and to pray and to seek to live for God. We need those kind of godly leaders in the home. But notice also the direction of his leadership, he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just. The focus of his leadership is on keeping God's ways, keeping the way of the Lord. Amen, you can teach your children lots of things and they are good things. You can teach your children how to work and you should. You can teach your children how to fish and hunt and all that's great. You can teach your children how to play ball. A lot of fathers spend a lot of time teaching their children those things. You can teach your children how to fix a car. You can teach your children how to do handy work around the house. All of those things are good. But if you teach them all those things and never teach them the way of the Lord, never teach them what God says and what God wants of them. You have failed as a father. I told you many times about my father and the fact that he was in an occupation that was very busy for him six days a week, 12 hours a day. He even had to go in on Sundays for a couple of hours before we came to church. But my dad led us in spiritual things. He didn't have much time to hunt or fish or play ball. He did that when he could with me as his son. But there wasn't a lot of time for that. But he did teach us. We never missed the church service. We were faithful to the Lord. He brought us with him. He led the way and he taught us spiritual truth. He taught us how to pray. He taught us how to have devotions. He taught us the importance of the Bible. I still have the Bible. He gave me when in 1970 I went off to Pete Bible College. And he wrote an inscription in the front of that Bible on the filial leaf. And he talked about all the professors I would have and the books I would read and all that I would study about the Word of God. And he said, John, don't ever forget this book stands above everybody else in any other book. And this book will guide you. And he was praying that I would always stay faithful to this book. That's how my dad led me. We need men who will provide spiritual leadership today. Who can lead in more than how to fix a car and how to hunt and fish. But how to follow God. A man of leadership like Abraham. We need men like that today. We need men who have that mark in them so that their children can say, that's my dad. He's a spiritual leader. But he was also a man of obedience. You know the story well, chapter 22. God tests Abraham by saying, I want you to offer up your son as a sacrifice. It is a chilling request and a mystifying request. How could God ask something like that of any father for any son? But how could he ask of Abraham for the son who is the only one through whom all of God's promises for the nation of Israel and for a deemer to come to the world? All of the promises of God rest in that sun. I think how can God ask Abraham to do that? And if you know the story, you know that God is simply testing his faith. But Abraham, the Bible says in chapter 22, verse 3, God up the next morning and got the provisions ready and set out for the journey. Obviously there must have been questions in his heart. Obviously his mind must have been reeling with this request, but he obeys. He does what God tells him to do. And you know the story. How God blessed him physically by providing a ram to take the place of Isaac. And God blessed him spiritually by renewing his covenant promises within why? Because he saw he had proven it was obvious to everybody including Abraham that Abraham was a man of obedience. There's another great man in the Bible who lost a son because of disobedience. That was David because of David's horrible string of disobeying God. Many acts that were a disobeied God with adultery and deceit and cover up and finally having the husband of Bathsheba killed in battle. And for a year covering that up and finally God convicts him and he does repent and come back to the Lord, but his son is already gone. Absalom turns against his father. Eventually leads a rebellion in the kingdom. There is a half-hearted forgiveness on the part of David. Very little contact between the two and Absalom leads a rebellion against his father. Takes the kingdom from him and ends up dying in battle. By David's own forces. When David gets the word that his son Absalom has died in spite of all that has happened between them and against David by his son. Look at what David says. Look at the cry of his heart. Second Samuel 18. The king was shaken. He went up to the room over the gateway and wept as he went. He said, oh my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom. If only I had died instead of you. Oh Absalom, my son, my son. You can just hear the heartbreak of a father who has lost his son because of disobedience. And I think when David says, I've only I had died. He's not just talking about the battle because David wasn't even involved in the battle. I think David was thinking I wish I had died before I lost you. I wish I had died before I committed that awful sin with Bathsheba and before this whole string of events led to the separation between us and your rebellion and my losing you this way. Oh Absalom, oh Absalom, I wish I had died. I hope no father in this room ever has to go through that agony because of disobedience. What we need today are fathers like Abraham who have distinguishing characteristics marks in their lives that their children can look and say, yes, that's my dad. You talk about a man of faith. That's my dad. You talk about a man of conviction who lives for heaven and not for earth. That's my dad. You talk about a man of leadership who will lead his family and set the example and lead them most of all in the ways of the Lord. That's my dad. You talk about a man of obedience. That's my dad. We need boys and girls and young men and young women who can look at their fathers and recognize the marks of godliness in their lives and thus become a generation of people who like their dads follow the Lord. It was a physical characteristic that Tucker recognized in Jeff, something that had happened 20 years ago, but he still bore the mark of that. 20 years from now, will your children be saying, looking at your life? My dad was a man of faith. My dad was a man of conviction. My dad was a man of leadership. My dad was a man of obedience. God help us to be men who have those marks in our lives. Let's pray together. Father, thank you for the powerful testimony Jeff has given us today. Thank you, Father, for the example that Abraham gives us today. And I pray that we will as fathers today commit ourselves to being the kind of men that our children will recognize us. When they hear a description of a godly man, they'll say, that's my dad. They'll recognize us. May we live with that passion to be the kind of man and father Abraham was. We ask in Jesus' name, amen.